Dog Days of Winter

Some photos from my mostly broken Minolta camera. Check out my flickr for more super-light leaked photos of NYC/Coney Island. Now... please excuse me while I go bake some cookies.

Hello 2013

Almost a year ago I made the decision to move to New York City with nothing but some material possessions and hope. Hope that somewhere in this sprawling metropolis I would find my place in the world. And I realize that sounds really silly, but hear me out.

A lot has happened in the past year. I quit my safe retail job and moved across the country. I struggled as an intern until finally getting my first big girl job in my field of study. I've found a few good friends in a city full of strangers and been on more dates than ever before. I've had to fix things, deal with frustrating landlords and make tough decisions. I survived Hurricane Sandy and a trip to the ER. I've been sick multiple times, gotten lost, taken the wrong trains, not slept enough, spent too much money, had too much fun. I've been to bars, parks, parades, concerts, rooftops, restaurants, museum, and ice cream parlors.

I jokingly refer to 2012 as my freshman year of adulthood. Because when you think about it, freshman years are that period of time at the beginning of something that you are expected to blunder along making mistakes with foolish confidence. And I've definitely made a lot of mistakes. I've felt small and unsure and inexperienced. I've felt lonely and young and silly. I've freaked about the future and the millions of directions it could go in. But I am comforted by remembering that I still have time. It's only my freshman year.

After years of people mistaking me for 16, friends who have known me for years are telling me I look like an adult now. Even though my wardrobe is mostly the same and nothing about my appearance is different enough to warrant these comments. Though it's funny because lately I have also been feeling like more of an adult. I still call my dad when I don't understand my health insurance or my mom when I want advice about my hair, but the decisions I make are mine. As is this money, this apartment, this stuff and these friends. Somehow throughout all the stress and struggles I found a place to belong and it may not be perfect but it's just right. I am excited to see how it changes and grows in my sophomore year. Because if history proves correct this time too, it will only get better from here.

I spent my New Year's Eve, my freshman year graduation, on rooftop in Manhattan not too far from Times Square. The door was locked so we had to climb out a window. It was difficult and a little scary, but every bit worth it to hear the roar of Times Square and feel the energy of this city, this place that I can add to my list of homes.